Sex positivity began as a powerful movement, promising freedom, acceptance and liberation from outdated stigmas. Over the past decade, however, something interesting has happened. This once radical idea evolved into a universal hashtag, a badge of honor, and, ironically, another societal expectation.

Today, young adults are overwhelmed with messages promoting sexual openness, exploration, and candid discussions about their desires. Social media platforms are replete with influencers sharing their personal journeys of sexual discovery, often encouraging their followers to do the same. This trend has been termed the rise of “sexfluencers” – individuals who use platforms like Instagram and TikTok to discuss sex openly, aiming to democratize sexual knowledge.

According to an article from Australia’s ABC, while this movement has made sexual education more accessible, it also raises concerns about the reliability of the information shared and the potential pressure it places on individuals to conform to these narratives.
Like wellness culture before it, where every smoothie and yoga pose becomes evidence of personal virtue, I believe sex positivity risks transforming from a genuine liberation into a performative expectation. Are people truly freer, or are they now feeling compelled to broadcast their sexual adventures to validate their openness?

Consider this: discussions once held privately now unfold under the scrutiny of an online audience. Questions of desire, boundaries and experimentation are no longer quietly navigated for one to explore and understand oneself; they’re publicly performed.

Individuals who feel less sexually adventurous or more traditional might wonder, “Am I doing something wrong?” Far from freeing everyone, the normalization of hyper-sexual openness may inadvertently leave some feeling alienated, ashamed or insufficient.

The occurrence of online dating has further complicated intimacy. Profiles become curated presentations of desirability, with swipe-based interactions encouraging snap judgments and reducing complex human connections to transactional exchanges.

According to a 2006 study, dating profiles are often curated to reflect an idealized version of the self, turning the search for a partner into a performance of desirability.

Additionally, a 2012 research article from the Association for Psychological Science found that the abundance of choice in digital dating environments can lead to a “shopping” mentality that undermines commitment and emotional investment.

Ghosting, breadcrumbing and other digital-era behaviors add new emotional tolls, heightening feelings of vulnerability and insecurity. Navigating these dynamics often feels less like freedom and more like navigating a minefield of expectations and disappointments.

In addition, what was once considered private has increasingly become public. The act of sharing intimate moments, confessions and explorations online has blurred the lines between genuine self-expression and performative openness.

With platforms like OnlyFans and explicit online communities thriving, my question becomes: are individuals embracing their sexual agency or succumbing to new pressures to legitimize and exhibit their private lives for validation and income?

Of course, there’s undeniable value in dismantling harmful stigmas. The strides made toward greater inclusivity and understanding are meaningful. Yet, when openness becomes an expectation rather than an invitation, it transforms from empowering into exhaustion and the constant of having to prove oneself.

True liberation isn’t about checking boxes, nor is it about public validation. It’s about the personal freedom to engage or not without judgment or expectation.

Perhaps the next decade’s challenge isn’t pushing boundaries further, but creating a quieter, less judgmental space for authentic choices and genuine self-discovery.